happy awesome day!

i used to said "someday i'll found my happiness..." or "one day i'll stopped being sad..." or " someday... someday i will finally feel fine again..." to feel a little positive.
i used to said "one day waking up is not hard anymore".
but i never knew that "someday" is today.
actually it was yesterday since today is already 29th and no longer 28th cos it's already 12.21 ...

first of all, happy birthday to me.


and for some one who dislike birthday so much, this year kinda' different cos i actually feel okay with my birthday.
usually i feel anxious when it comes to my birthday. well, i do freaking out little bit about the big two-o, but beside that i feel fine... maybe being twenty is not that bad after all...
and this year, finally, for the first time after 8 years i didn't shed a tears, not even a single tear. Big thing!!
and on top of that i woke up without the pains that usually there.
maybe i outgrew all my problems. maybe the pains just finally healed. or maybe, maybe i just don't give a damn rat's ass about it anymore.

how can i put this?
this birthday just perfect.
great family, fabulous friends, perfect presents and bunch of awesome birthday greetings. and the most important thing was i don't have any reason to feel sad.
after too much years being sad and feel miserable, i think i deserve to feel fine... :)

and i think, i have everyone to thank to...
my family, REJECTS, SG, my perfect stranger, agus, and everyone...
now, let's hope this fine feeling will be nice beginning to one nice life.
see? i even sound positive... *well, i think this one is not because my birthday, but either lack of sleep or too depressed because all the final assignments...*
i think sheila was right... i need to sleep...
so catch you friends, followers, readers, and stalkers later...
happy awesome day guys!!

"When i was sad, i just stop being sad and be AWESOME instead. true story. " - Barney Stinson
How I Met Your Mother